The Friend: Love Is Not a Big Enough Word

His wife was just thirty-four. They had two little girls. The cancer was everywhere, and the parts of dying that nobody talks about were about to start. His best friend came to help out for a couple weeks. And he never left. [ view in browser.   add esquire@newsletter.esquire.com to your address book ]             FOLLOW US       The Friend: Love Is Not a Big Enough Word   Most of September 17, 2012, has evaporated from my mind. I still have a few memories. I have the way the surgeon's voice shook. I remember my wife calling my name while she was still under sedation. And I have an image of the hospital floor, up close. I remember white tile and a hope: Maybe I will never have to get up. Maybe they will just let me die here. Nicole was thirty-four, and the doctor had been direct: "It's everywhere," he said. "Like somebody dipped a paintbrush in cancer and flicked it around her abdomen." I staggered down a hallway and then collapsed. I remember the tile, close to my face, and then watching it retreat as my best friend picked me up from the floor. His name is Dane Faucheux, and I remember noting, even in the midst of a mental fugue: Dane's a lot stronger than I realized. I was in shock and stayed there a long time. READ MORE       Jonathan Groff Breaks Down the Final Scene of Mindhunter   "Isn't that a horrifying image?" Read On         Stranger Things 2 Is Great, But I Can't Ignore These Two Problems   What were they thinking here? Read On         20 Ways to Instantly Make Any Room More Stylish   Small details make a big difference. Read On         Brad Paisley Just Showed the True Heart of Country Music   The CMA can't stifle the genre's progress on gun control. Read On         Burton's NASA-Inspired Olympic Uniforms Are the Only Thing I Want to Wear This Winter   The U.S. Snowboard Team is headed to infinity and beyond. Read On       Unsubscribe •  Privacy Policy   esquire.com ©2017 Hearst Communications Inc. All Rights Reserved. Hearst Email Privacy, 300 W 57th St., Fl. 19 (sta 1-1), New York, NY 10019