How to Feel Normal

Until recently my life with ADHD felt like a bunch of small piles of good intentions strewn around the house.

View in Browser How to Feel Normal There has been a change in my life that is massive and boring, miraculous and quotidian. After decades of failing, flailing, and frustration, I am on medication and in therapy for ADHD. My brain is finally beginning to work properly, and the biggest breakthrough is the smallest: now I rinse the last dish. Perhaps you think of ADHD as a racing mind, a restless energy, a propensity to focus a little bit on a lot of things, but for me, the symptoms were all in the sink. I'd always been good at starting to do the dishes. I'd come in hot every time, then get 85% of the way through and burn out. My mind would flash to any of the other dozen tasks I'd left 85% done, and I'd rush off to finish one of those. A dirty dish and a fork left to be tended to at a later time, when I was 85% into something else. There was always a little bit of laundry left unfolded, a bill or two left unpaid, a to-do list almost all crossed off. That's what my ADHD looked like in adulthood: small piles of good intentions strewn around the house. If you or someone you know has it, you already know what ADHD looks like. But what is it? "ADHD is a neuro-developmental delay," says Eric Tivers, a clinical social worker and CEO of ADHD reWired, a community and coaching service for people with the condition, like him and me. "It's a dysfunction in how the brain regulates the transmission and communication of dopamine." And that dysfunctional distribution of dopamine doesn't only result in inattentiveness, it also allows for a kind of hyper-focus. "It's not a deficit of attention, it's an inability to apply the correct amount of attention at the right times. It's a regulation disorder, at the heart of it." 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Read the Full Story 40 'Star Wars'-Themed Gifts That Are Actually Really Cool At the rate all these new Star Wars movies and games and TV shows come out, it's almost always going to be a great time to give a gift to a Star Wars fan that celebrates, well, being a fan of Star Wars. But right now, we're in something of a lull. The latest trilogy concluded with Rey making it with Kylo Ren right before he died (plus some other stuff), the new video game consoles didn't release with a huge Star Wars title, and all the Star Wars TV offshoots are still very much "coming soon" and "in the works." That being said, The Mandalorian is gearing up for a third season of Baby Yoda fanaticism, and Disney+ is chock-full of re-re-rewatching potential. So if you're on the lookout for a gift that honors the intensely emotional feeling those blue letters on the screen inspire, here are 40 ideas for awesome Star Wars merch, from collectible collaborations to unexpected crossovers. May the Force...well, you get it. Read the Full Story On The Road With The Big Red Dirigible Of Christmas Love It's a week before Christmas, and one minute I'm futzing with recyclables, living what constitutes a basically normal life, and the next a plain brown package arrives at the door, a little gift I've sent myself. It's an item that, out of context, might make me seem scary or, if I were my own neighbor, might in fact scare me. I'm thirty-three years old, and I've bought myself a Santa suit. Read the Full Story Follow Us Unsubscribe | Privacy Notice/Notice at Collection esquire.com ©2021 Hearst Magazine Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Hearst Magazines, 300 West 57th Street, New York, NY 10019