This Trump Problem Has an Easy Solution

Slap a GPS tracker on one of his swollen ankles and confine him to his banana farm in Florida. Drop a multimegaton fine on him every time he goes batshit on social media. Freeze his assets. Treat him like a mob boss, a drug kingpin, or the leader of a terrorist cell because, in one way or another, he is all three of those things. As we have said before, there is no such constitutional office as "Former President*." He's just another citizen jamoke, like you and me and the guy who poured you your last pint on Saturday. If you, or I, or that barman were under indictment and behaved like The Defendant has behaved toward the criminal justice system, we'd have been hauled off to the sneezer days ago.

View in Browser  SHOP EXCLUSIVE SUBSCRIBE I Have an Idea for Solving The Justice System's Donald Trump Problem Slap a GPS tracker on one of his swollen ankles and confine him to his banana farm in Florida. Drop a multimegaton fine on him every time he goes batshit on social media. Freeze his assets. Treat him like a mob boss, a drug kingpin, or the leader of a terrorist cell because, in one way or another, he is all three of those things. As we have said before, there is no such constitutional office as "Former President*." He's just another citizen jamoke, like you and me and the guy who poured you your last pint on Saturday. If you, or I, or that barman were under indictment and behaved like The Defendant has behaved toward the criminal justice system, we'd have been hauled off to the sneezer days ago. Read More Why This Wrecked Ferrari Is Worth $1.9 Million Even though this barn find is a wrecked and burnt shell, its rarity still meant it could bring in serious cash at the recent R.M. Sotheby's Auction during Monterey Car Week. Read More 'Yellowstone' Fans Are Still Supporting Cole Hauser While the future of the series is still undecided, the Rip Wheeler actor is clearly getting on with his life. Read More Persecution in the Name of the Lord Publicly funded Christian colleges and universities across the U. S. have long exploited a legal loophole to control and discriminate against LGBTQ+ students with impunity— inflicting financial pain and emotional trauma in the process. Now there's a new battle brewing over this warped version of religious freedom. At CCU, as at many conservative evangelical schools, undergraduates must sign a "lifestyle covenant," or honor code, that forbids certain behaviors. In the 2022–23 student handbook, tucked between bans on arson and sexual assault, was a prohibition on "Same-sex relationships: engaging in a romantic same-sex relationship, defending, or advocating for same-sex romantic relationships." Additionally, under the school's "knowing presences policy," students who failed to report their rule-breaking peers could also be disciplined, facing penalties as severe as suspension or dismissal. Read More The 20 Best Leather Sneakers for Dressing Up, Down, and Everywhere In Between Don't get stuck in a rut. Get one of these pairs instead. Read More The 14 Best Breathable Shoes Are Airy and Light Heat and humidity are no match for these. Read More Read an Excerpt From Stephen King's 'Holly' "God, please help me do the best I can for Penny Dahl and for her daughter. If someone took that young woman, I hope she's still alive, and it's your will I should find her. I'm taking my Lexapro, which is good. I'm smoking again, which is bad." She thinks of Saint Augustine's prayer and smiles into her clasped hands. "Help me to stop . . . but not today." Read More Follow Us Unsubscribe | Privacy Notice/Notice at Collection esquire.com ©2023 Hearst Magazine Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Hearst Magazines, 300 West 57th Street, New York, NY 10019