In New York, sex-positive communities have evolved into something more organized than outsiders tend to imagine. Not just parties but curated ecosystems built on vetting, trust, and a shared commitment to consent. Alain Rostain, a Yale-trained computer scientist and longtime consultant, spent much of his life drawn to power, structure, and desire. Eventually, he applied the same thinking he used in professional settings to the messiest arena of all: intimacy. For this installment of the Secret Lives of Men, Rostain reflects on how he went from throwing after-parties for a fetish community in 2010 to building Top Floor, an invite-only erotic space shaped by improvisational principles, strict boundaries, and the belief that "the vibe" is fragile enough to protect at all costs. After leaving the project in 2016, he returned years later with a new ambition and a trusted copartner—to combine connection, erotic honesty, and accountability into something that lasts. |
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No shame brother, but if you got here by Googling "How to wear a blazer and jeans," let's have a little heart-to-heart. Whenever you try a new look, it will feel like a big step, but a dressed down jacket and jeans is as classic as it gets. Sure, if it's outside your normal thing, a friend or loved one is going to say something, but that shouldn't dissuade you. For example, I recently just started wearing sunglasses inside. I was in a New York City subway car. This means nothing to the rest of the country, but the new city cars are monstrosities with TV advertising boards and ultra cool white light, interrogation room light, the kind of light they shine on you when you're in a straitjacket. I left my low-ish tint sunglasses on to keep things more bearable. We got outside in the sun, walked to the bar, sat down inside, and I...kept them on. After a beat, my wife goes, "Sunglasses inside?" I say, "Yeah, do I look insane?" She responds, "No it's fine, order me a martini." I do it all the time now, and she's started saying it's "cool," not just fine. If my wife (my harshest critic) can get behind me wearing sunglasses inside (the most up-my-own-ass wannabe rockstar of all looks), you can try something new and throw a blazer over your T-shirt and jeans (the most agreeable, classic of looks). So, if you came here for some reassurance I will say: Yes, you will look cool in a blazer and jeans. Also, they're only clothes; you wear them or you don't. |
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"You want any of this?" The text arrived in 2019 from a close friend, followed by a dozen photos of his grandmother's liquor collection. The cabinet of treasures spanned three decades. Crown Royal from 1959 sat next to 1967 Schenley OFC Canadian and 1962 Johnnie Walker Black Label. But two bottles on the top shelf toward the back made my heart race: Old Fitzgerald 6-Year bottled-in-bond bourbons from 1970 and 1972, made at the famed Stitzel-Weller Distillery. Vintage Stitzel-Weller whiskey—exceptional liquid made by Pappy Van Winkle himself, whose cultural mystique has elevated modern bottles bearing his name into unicorns—is the holy grail of bourbon collecting. And I had the chance to buy two. |
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Rocky is decked in full Chanel: mink trapper hat, cream collared shirt, and black slacks. "I got Chanaynay," slang for Chanel, "on all day," he jokes. He also points out that his red reptile shoes and belt are different hues of red because he's always liked mismatching. The quartet of women spy Rocky putting on his gray trench and shuffle out ahead of him in stilettos. They stand near the front of the restaurant, coatless and smoking cigarettes. When Rocky climbs into his Ferrari, one of the women stilts over to his window. For a pulse, I think he'll peel off, but instead he lowers it. "Do you mind if we get a photo?" she asks. "Not tonight," Rocky says, and flashes a smile. "And besides, it's cold outside. Y'all need some coats." He rolls up the window and revs his engine and says, "If this were six years ago, I would've taken them all with me." |
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It appears that there is a serious divide developing within the Democratic party at its upper levels. (And, as Toby Ziegler once put it, the oddsmakers take another beating.) At issue, believe it or not, is the ongoing pogrom being carried out by the administration in Minneapolis and elsewhere. The pols closest to the action—chiefs of police, mayors, some governors—seem better able to articulate the popular (and entirely justified) anger at the obvious authoritarianism unleashed on the streets. However, the people with aspirations for the presidency seem to be taking a, well, nuanced view of the whole thing. For example, over the weekend, Philadelphia district attorney Larry Krasner read the riot attack at the possibility that ICE will bring Minneapolis to Philadelphia. He was not ... nuanced. |
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If you've been to a hotel in the past year or so, you may have noticed something new. Nearly every hotel, from the casual roadside stop to the all-inclusive resort has all of a sudden started to focus on wellness. There are mocktail menus at complimentary happy hours, group yoga classes, locally sourced in-room snacks—the list goes on and on to varying degrees of what one might consider wellness. This is by design because, well, we all are obsessed with being well right now. Wellness, however you define it, has stopped being something just a few travelers want and become something nearly every traveler expects. Hotels are not dumb, either. They know that we, as travelers, are willing to pay big bucks for wellness. The global wellness market was valued at $893.9 billion in 2024, according to Statista, and is showing no signs of slowing down. This influx, from our perspective, is not a bad thing. We're already working to well-ify our lives back home, so why would we want to leave that behind when we travel? But we also say this with confidence: Not all wellness travel is created equal. We believe that to truly classify as a wellness destination worth traveling for, you have to offer more than just nonalcoholic mini-bar options and a treadmill in the "gym." In order for a hotel or resort to really be a wellness destination in our book, it has to offer something unique that you can't get anywhere else and, more than that, has to integrate wellness into every aspect of the property. These are tall orders, but luckily for the wellness obsessed like us, more and more properties are moving in that direction. Some are brand-spanking-new, built from the ground up with wellness in mind. Others are more established but have gone back to the drawing board to redefine what wellness means to them and truly create something new. Still others have quietly been on the wellness tip for years but have pushed the envelope by providing new resources and new experiences built on their wealth of wellness knowledge. We spent the year traveling the globe to find the most exciting, most innovative, and most unique new wellness destinations around the world for this list. So whether you want to train better, sleep better, eat better or just feel better, these are the places worth booking for a visit. |
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